To start with, I used to think I was good at arguments until I came across a specimen from an altogether different category--one that does not argue. I havent really reached a point where I can say that these people dont argue either because they dont want to or because they dont know how to. I'm content to assume that this kind doesnt argue for the sole purpose of irritating rational thinkers (like me, of course!) who are prone to brain wrenching 'discussions'.
What, you may ask, is the problem then? Someone refusing to argue is a great thing; especially at these times that demand world PEACE. To trace the answer we need to explore what causes the 'need to argue' in the first place. Undoubtedly, the major cause is accusation-denial. Y does something that is :
a) generally (also universally!) recognized as 'not correct' and
b) something X doesnt like or has affected X in some way, usually the bad way!
In normal circumstances, X blames Y (more rightly so) and Y denies; so they both end up 'arguing'. The real act of 'arguing' usually comprises verbal (sometimes high pitched) claims by both X and Y willing to prove their stand 'correct'. Notice, it becomes a harder task for Y, who has to prove something incorrect as 'correct'. Harder still, if X turns out to be a tad smarter.
So what happens in the case of Y not arguing? X's thought processes go like this:
1. Should I bring it up now?
2. Ok, I know the result, I might as well have one burden less to worry about
(Confronts Y..who, despite knowing what this is going to be about, acts innocent)
3. The initial 'conversation':
X : I want to talk to you about alpha,beta,gamma...
Y : yeah...
X : (Explaining the issue in clear,coherent terms for a full 2 minutes) What you did was not fair..
Y : Ok
(X is reaching closer to limits of patience...Somehow the 'Ok' sounds like 'I dont care what you think..Go get a life now! X says something that will make Y say a couple of more words...Y is just not interested. Y's attention is now more on the laptop and remote control...)
X : Wont you even SAY SOMETHING..?? or waitt...anything for that matter?
Y : Ok
X : 'Ok' is not the answer I want...what about my argument?
Y : I can only say 'Ok'. If you want me to say what you want to hear; tell me what it is.
X : I just told you my problem...you were supposed to have listened to it..
Y : Ok
Sadly, X's patience reserves are exhausted at this point and as X so often rightly decides, the only way to end the 'argument' is yell out all that X can think of and LEAVE as soon as possible.
It's a pity not to argue; more pitiful to try and argue with someone who doesnt!
As you might rightly have guessed, X is I and Y is...err...why mee!!!
